I wish I could say that I was cool and calm when I got the diagnosis. I probably looked cool and calm because when I’m really stressed I retreat into a no-feeling land and turn into a robot.
So it was a robot that faced the doctor, and all I could do was look down the notebook I had and ask him questions and write down his answers, cursing my shaky hand. I have always taken copious notes, and this habit was to stand me in good stead in the months ahead. If anything it gave me something to do, otherwise wound up like a tight spring, I would have burst into tears.
BisforBananasCisforCancer 